It’s been 3 months since the resentencing so I feel I might be able to talk about it. We’ll see if the words flow or if I block the memories still.
On the first day, Alan’s lawyer texted me the court number and as I was looking for the room, I had to go through a group of people. Only once I passed them and saw the number on the room next to them that I realized they were the victims’ family, and I was… embarrassed and alone. Despite being called to order, they were taking pictures, it was a family reunion. They knew who I was as I heard “That’s his wife”. The minutes weren’t going fast enough to take us inside as I sat there, wanting to disappear.
My emotions settle after I took place on “his side” of the courtroom and I saw him in person for the first time in many months. It felt unreal to have him right there, however, we couldn’t touch or communicate. He wasn’t even allowed to look at the gallery.
But that was nothing compared to the bomb that was about to drop that day! Bruce, his co-defendant who took a plea-deal at the time, refused to corroborate the State story and declared several times wanting to tell the truth. The jury was escorted out while the judge and prosecutor were menacing him with perjury and losing his deal but it still happened. When he first contradicted the prosecutor, my jaw literally dropped (the expression took its full meaning to me that day!). I tried to hide it behind my hand but I know my eyes were wild too. Even though Bruce was taken out that day without the opportunity for the defense to cross-examined him (despites the prosecutor asking several questions in front of the jury before the “incident”), it was a great feeling to know he wanted to do the right thing and tell the truth. After all these years, I can only imagine how Alan was feeling. To us, as people, it was a small victory.
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